I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
