After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
