He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
