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And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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