Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize