I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
