He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
