is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize