the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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