why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
