But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
