Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
