i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
