What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
