Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
