Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
