But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
