have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Fuck appropriateness.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Green mimosas i think yes
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize