Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
