I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
