WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize