Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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