Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
