Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
