nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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