No, drunk sperm still make babies.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
