PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I need water and some morals
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
