She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I checked into jail on foursquare
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
