sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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