One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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