he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize