I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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