let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
