Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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