how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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