dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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