bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
