words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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