he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize