saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
