i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Randomize
