I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Randomize
