if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
