I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
