The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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