Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
