So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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