u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
