the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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