I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
