What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I FOUND THE LEGS
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
